Endings and Beginnings

[arnoldsmom]

I recently joined this forum when I adopted a 4 year old Rottweiler/Lab mix. I hesitated to enter the Rainbow Bridge because deaths that I have experienced in the last 5 years have brought so much pain that I was afraid that it would hurt too much to read your stories. Just the opposite, I found so much human caring and understanding that I would like (with your patience) to take this opportunity to say goodbye to those special to me and share the beginnings that those endings brought.

5 years ago, my mother died of liver cancer. She was 60. In trying to be strong for my Dad, I pushed the pain deep. A year later, my Dad died of liver cancer. About then, I went numb. My husband doesn't deal well with death & was not much help. Without the absolute love of my lab/shepard (Katy)and rottweiler/shepard (Bill), I don't know what I would have done.

I promised my father that I would take in his 11 year old Australian Cattle Dog, Sammi.
This made 3 dogs and 2 cats in our house. Sammi was greaving & struggling with the adjustment. Bill and Katy immediately accepted Sammi and we all settled in to our new life.

1 year later, Bill (rott/shep)died at 13. He was a stray that moved in with us when he was 2. He was a clown that made everyone around him laugh. I was beginning to think bad things were going to happen every year & the pain would never go away.

1 year after that, my beloved Katy (lab/shep) died at 17. I had raised her from 8 weeks & everyone who knew this gentle, intelligent animal with eyes that spoke volumes was saddened. Suddenly, the numbness turned to tears & I thought I would never stop crying. Night after night, Sammi (my dad's precious gift to me) would lay with her head in my lap and comfort me.

1 year later, Sammi is 16 and still going strong. We adopted Arnold (Sammi is thrilled to have a new friend).

In 5 years I lost my parents and my two special friends. The grief I felt for my pets was as strong as that which I felt for my parents. Many people cannot understand this but I know that all of you will.

I know that I will eventually lose Sammi, but I belive now that she was in my life for a reason and when she goes, I will be returning her to my father - her true owner.

So, good-bye to my cherished ones. You are not gone, but just gone ahead....