Why? What you should have done.....

[Judi W]

Why? What you should have done………

Most of us who have been training and trialing dogs for any length of time are quite accustomed and comfortable with being told “what you did wrong” or “what you should have done”. We appreciate the information because it improves. It might be something in the training that an observer can see we could improve on, or it might be something we did in the ring that made it harder for the dog or even made the difference between success or failure. This information gives us something to practice and to keep in mind so that we don’t make the same mistake in the future.

That same philosophy should apply to those who present a problem and are told they “should have done” something different than they did. The reason for the “should have done’s” is that one can then have a picture of a better choice the next time the same or a similar incidence arises. If you have a picture in your mind of a better way of doing something then you can quickly act on it instead of fumbling around and perhaps end up in a serious situation. In some cases, actual lives are at stake. The dog’s life can be forfeit should the owner/handler make a bad decision in managing that dog. This can apply to such things as leaving gates unlocked so dogs can escape and get hit by a car, to mismanaging an unstable dog and allowing it to be put in a situation where it bites someone. Usually we get off without too serious a consequence and count it lesson learned, but that lesson does little good if an alternative is not decided upon and determined to be acted.

So, please accept those “should have done’s” as education for future actions and decisions.

[Patty1231]

We learn more from our failures than we do our successes.

[sophie's-mom]

Originally Posted by Patty1231

We learn more from our failures than we do our successes.

Only if you can admit it was a failure in the first place.

[Patty1231]

Originally Posted by sophie's-mom

Only if you can admit it was a failure in the first place.

Whether or not we accept and learn from constructive criticism depends quite a bit on how it is presented.

[sophie's-mom]

Originally Posted by Patty1231

Whether or not we accept and learn from constructive criticism depends quite a bit on how it is presented.

Actually it would be in how it is interpreted!

It can be PRESENTED in a very mature, matter of fact way and still be interpreted as something else.

[Patty1231]

Originally Posted by sophie's-mom

Actually it would be in how it is interpreted!

It can be PRESENTED in a very mature, matter of fact way and still be interpreted as something else.

We can go back and forth on this all day - once again proving Judi's point.

[RottieMom51503]

Judi WWhy? What you should have done………

Most of us who have been training and trialing dogs for any length of time are quite accustomed and comfortable with being told “what you did wrong” or “what you should have done”. We appreciate the information because it improves. It might be something in the training that an observer can see we could improve on, or it might be something we did in the ring that made it harder for the dog or even made the difference between success or failure. This information gives us something to practice and to keep in mind so that we don’t make the same mistake in the future.

That same philosophy should apply to those who present a problem and are told they “should have done” something different than they did. The reason for the “should have done’s” is that one can then have a picture of a better choice the next time the same or a similar incidence arises. If you have a picture in your mind of a better way of doing something then you can quickly act on it instead of fumbling around and perhaps end up in a serious situation. In some cases, actual lives are at stake. The dog’s life can be forfeit should the owner/handler make a bad decision in managing that dog. This can apply to such things as leaving gates unlocked so dogs can escape and get hit by a car, to mismanaging an unstable dog and allowing it to be put in a situation where it bites someone. Usually we get off without too serious a consequence and count it lesson learned, but that lesson does little good if an alternative is not decided upon and determined to be acted.

So, please accept those “should have done’s” as education for future actions and decisions.

Judi, Thank you for this post. It makes a great deal of sense to me. I think it pretains to my recent thread about Bear. At the time of everything going on last night, going in my bedroom didn't even enter my mind. I was just thinking I need to get them out of here before they get in here. When you are actually in the situation you don't think logical so it's good to have a plan before a situation like mine arises so you can easily think of the best solution. Now I can see Bruce's suggestion is a much better route to take and will do that next time.

Thank you for helping me understand what Bruce was trying to say in a constructive way and you are right the next time this happens I will have it in my mind to take Daphne and Bear and go to my bedroom where Dan is, rather than trying to scare the "intruder" with one of the dogs.

[Sharon Marples]

Moderator's..............STICKY please! Excellent post (as usual!).

[Judi W]

Exactly. It is "if - then" planning. We've all been told to have a plan should the house catch on fire, but that applies to many other things as well.

In one of my earlier "lives" I was a pilot for an FBO. When flying single engine, the instructors had always stressed "if you lose your engine, where are you going to set it down" and you'd darn well better always have someplace in mind. Then to bring it home they would turn off the gas and make you prove it. When flying a twin, you'd darn well better be able to handle the plane on one engine which is very different than with both functioning. That philosophy stuck with me all the time I flew and has stayed with me in most other areas of my life. If no one has taught you to plan these things then it is important to at least learn after the first near disaster and not wait and repeat the same things.

Here's what I could have and should have done means you have an understanding for next time.

[XenaKash]

Excellent post!

I like it actually being told i'm doing something wrong, or could do something better. Well as long as I trust the source is knowalible(I can't spell at all ) of what they are talking about. But to me it helps me improve what I am doing or trying to do.
I'm out to learn and not try to be a big know it all. I want what's best for the situation.

[MonteRiehl]

Originally Posted by Judi W

Exactly. It is "if - then" planning. We've all been told to have a plan should the house catch on fire, but that applies to many other things as well.
Here's what I could have and should have done means you have an understanding for next time.

You can also call this "worst case scenario" planning or disaster planning. It is not only wise but just plain old prudent to have worst case scenario plans in your head.

In my mind, it is a real sign of maturity when people have identified what the worst case scenario is, and actively avoid it. Good plans identify the various "steps" along the way towards both successes and disasters. This WCS planning applies to everything. Dog training, flight safety, computer upgrades, home renovations etc.

Many people seem to lack this ability to plan ahead for both WCS's, and also successes. These same people often dismiss WCS planning as fear-mongering. It's not, it's just an identification and mature decision making process at work.

When disasters strike, (and they seem to more and more often) it is the people who have already identified what needs to be done that step to the front.

I have many WCS plans I use in my training with S'Dragon. If I undersocialize, or physically dominate him, those are steps toward a disaster of him biting someone.
If he is giving me warning signs (body language) that he is not planning to behave well, I immediately take steps to avoid that situation before it builds to a head.
For example, if he is posturing and growling at a person, I correct for the inappropriate behaviour, and move off to avoid a potential disaster. If I cannot, I put him into a "control" position and keep him there until the situation has passed. I do not do this because I believe he will bite, but because I do not even want a remote possibility that he could be in a position where he could choose to do so. I identified the WCS, and avoided it.

This WCS planning does not mean that we do not get out, I just have a plan in my head about what a successful trip out is, and what is a worst case scenario.

Don't be afraid to avoid situations where you can get into WCS mode.

[TrishB]

I've had excellent advice given to me while I've been working with Parker. Some has been in handling, training, approach, praise, correction, speed, stance.... I could go on and on. To all of those people, I have openly thanked. I asked for their advice and they gave it, freely.

I've also had 'advice' given without solicitation from me. While I'm sure that 90% of the time, the advice is valid, sometimes you have to take a step back and wait until the person is ready to listen to you. When I'm about to go into the ring is NOT that time! LOL

I've also had people give advice when I wouldn't have asked them for it. When you've been around for a bit - you get to know who you admire, who you trust. So those 'free advice givers' whether you asked or not, make situations a little painful.

For me, I appreciate it when I can ask a question and people consider their answers. They draw on their education, experience, perceptions and understanding. These are the answers where I hang on every word. These are the conversations that I beg to join in on.

[Platzz]

As long as one stays open-minded they will continue to learn. The my way or the highway types are usually destined to crash.

[scooterjohansen]

People who already know it all are the ones who don't take constructive criticism very well. Then of course there are people who just don't have the ability to learn.

[Judi W]

I was stimulated to start this thread when someone recently presented a very serious problem and then got her knickers in a knot because she was told "should have done" to explain that she had other options than the one she selected. When a problem is presented to the forums, it is assumed that one is soliciting advice, not just looking for attention. Sometimes it takes a while for the rest of us to understand that it was attention seeking rather than advice seeking. When a person who presents a question but will argue and argue about it, I'm getting a bit quicker at getting the point.