[richnthor]

I too was involved with football and that mantra "suck it up" was yelled in our ears, while I knew when something hurt. I believe that without being honest with ourselves we will have trouble, the breaking down in tears out of control in front of a neighbor or stranger especially in front of a female made me feel weak, was a total embarassment to show how I hurt when my Thor was gone. Ironically later while coaching kids football I remember carrying one sobbing young boy off the field after a hard hit. As I carried him with surrounding men yelling, "you're OK, shake it off" I was whispering in his ear "that hit hurt and you know it. I'm sure I would have felt like crying too until the hurt goes away. Don't listen to people who don't feel what you feel. Let me know when your are ready to go back in." He later went on to be an outstanding High School player.

Dogs have always been part of my life except while in college. Thor captured my heart like none other. He was of course very strong, had a confident demeanor, always by my knee as if guarding me (maybe he felt safe and liked me), wanted to be the alpha dog, yet what I admired was how gentle he was with me, and while unconsciously playing roughly with my other dog, he never made him yelp. It was that controlled strength, confidence, muscular build that made it a pleasure just to watch him. In a way I thought of him as a small horse. A horse is big and strong, and to be enjoyed must learn that the owner is the leader. A reminder may be necessary from time to time. Because he adapted to his role so well, I was so proud of him, had to fight off spoiling him by letting him get away with some behaviors, he had captured my heart. Memory is such a gift, a physical presense may be gone but the memory is as fresh as always. Normally when I lost a dog I hurried to get another to cut the hurt; this time I have looked at others but haven't seen one quite the same--perhaps I don't want them to be the same.