I got tears in my eyes reading this because I had just lost my pride and joy, Raven, six weeks ago. I don't think you are nuts or crazy or anything. I feel the same. I have her ashes here and every day I kiss the urn and tell her how much I miss her and still love her just as much as when she was here. What is really hard for me is that she passed away in my bedroom while I was at work. So every time I go in there I still see her laying there at the foot of the bed and think about her taking her last breath there. It's terribly hard to forget that. I know it helps that she was here at home at the time but I can't seem to get it out of my head that I let her down because I didn't have her put down that morning. My vet's office was closed that day and the next was Thanksgiving. I had called the emergency number to let the on call vet know that she had labored breathing but seemed like she might be okay. I don't know but maybe I was in denial that I would lose her because her illness came on way too quickly. She was fine one morning and just a couple of hours later she was not herself. She passed away six days after her diagnosis of congestive heart failure and kidney failure.
Yes, I talk to her all the time like she is still here. I cuddle on Brandy more now to help comfort myself. Raven was a very special girl to me. There will never be another Raven. I am looking for another Rottie but it's hard to find another just now. I even walked out of Petsmart after looking at the adoptable dogs with tears in my eyes.
So hang in there and know that you are not alone in feeling like you are. Our dogs are still in hearts forever.
