| Hi Jo - I'm so sorry to hear of your loss of Brutus. I've been through this with my daughter with several pets. Strange as it may seem, helping the children through this will also help you.
Everyone has given you very good advice, the best thing to say is that he was so old and his body wore out, he got sick, the vet couldn't help him and he died at the vet's.
Get the book called "The Tenth Good Thing About Barney" by Judith Viorst from the library or bookstore. It tells about the death of the family cat and how the children remembered him by making a list of 10 best things they liked about him.
Encourage the children to talk about Brutus and remember all the things they liked most about him, things you did together, funny things that happened, etc. Make your own list of "The Ten Best things About Brutus".
Have a "memorial service". Get a big rock from your yard or elsewhere, and make it Brutus' rock. Put it in a special place, plant some flowers around it - let the children choose the flowers (annuals, so they will come up year after year as a remembrance). Get everyone together (children's mom can be included if you are comfortable with that), read your list of 10 things, everyone says goodbye, and cry a little.
We actually had a memorial garden with rocks for all of the pets that died (only one dog, though)while my daughter was growing up. Now she's an adult, and when I moved to a smaller home 2 yrs ago, she helped me to dig up all the memorial stones and put them in the garden of my present house.
Another thing you can do if you have a nice picture of Brutus (or better yet, a picture of Brutus with the children) - have an enlargement made, get a nice frame, and put it in a prominent place in your home - its a nice remembrance.
The important thing is to encourage the children talk freely and remember Brutus - and to know its OK to cry if they feel like it. It's a very sad time for all of you, but helping the children get through it will also help you.
[ May 08, 2001: Message edited by: 2rotties2luv ]
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